I was thinking about what it was like in my first internship as the only youth pastor of the church back in 1986-87. I knew a little bit from the youth pastors in my life. I knew a little bit from my youth degree, I knew a little bit from the ministry I grew up going to, participating in and there were some great things from my experience that stayed with me. I knew enough about God's Word to believe He gifted me, called me, and made me who I was and so... I just went and did it and to this day continue on with the same little ole steps that keep me moving forward, enjoying leadership, enjoying ministry, enjoying life. Hopefully you will be encouraged a little bit by reading this today and will ultimately look behind you and see a ministry following you!
Leadership comes with experience by hard knocks, mistakes, failure, trying, dreaming, believing, trusting, input from mentors that love you, experience, a little theory, with much heart and some big time...guts without an expectation of glory or the fear of not being loved or even liked. My dad used to tell me, "It doesn't matter how many times you fall down. It matters how many times you are willing to get back up." A pithy saying? I used to read books on leadership; I used to wish that I could be a better leader. I used to wish I could lead like "those other guys." I used to pray that God would make me a good leader. Then one day I woke up and realized I was leading. I was doing it.
Oh, I have had many, many failures. I have had some successes. I have done things that "ticked" people off. I have made decisions that people didn't like, I have led in ways that others have led. I have led in ways that I made up myself. But, I was leading. I was in the battle, I was doing what I believed was Biblical, honest, what I believed was right, what I believed was God's leading. How did I know I was leading? Someone once said, "A leader will know he is leading, when he looks behind him and can see the people following. Of course the flip side is "A leader will know he is not leading when he looks behind him and no one is following." Another pithy saying?
I write to this NNYM not because I think I'm somebody. I write these little articles because I remember the early years in the trenches. The tough years when I felt like I was out there all by myself. I had a plan but I was scared to death to implement it. What if it failed? I remember the days when leadership was something others did and did it so much better than little ole me. Who would listen to this green horn? Who would follow this inexperienced, blue collar kind of guy? Who would follow my leadership? Then one day I looked back and there was a staff behind me with students behind me. There were parents that saying-- "Go man Go" and so it was time to leadership was on. Who, which great leader would I emulate? Which great youth ministry would I want my ministry to look like? What in the world was I to do?
I decided what seems a long time ago to go and do what I believed I was asked, called, paid to do-- To lead. To push on with what I knew in my heart was where God wanted the ministry to go. I had to develop what God had made me to be... and I was and am right now in continuing to be in process. There was no formula. I tried formulas but it just wasn't me. I tried other people's ideas some good, some goofy, some not even close to who I was, how I needed to lead, or where I needed to go. Nevertheless the first couple of years, I can say I tried it all.
Personally, the street has been a great teacher. I learned some very important things by just hitting the pavement, the street if you will. I was not over confident by any means. As a matter of fact at my core, I can be pretty insecure. It was time for me to trust in what God was making me to be. It was time to believe that His little call on me was greater than I thought or tried to deny. It was time to take some small and large steps. It was time to get in the trench, to put my feet on the ground, to start leading period.
Step one: Knowing what I knew from Biblical studies, a good well rounded view of the Truth, where did I believe God wanted me to take the ministry? Would I read a book? Would I follow the leader Guru's? Well I took a few baby steps with what I believed the Scriptures taught. I shared, taught, and lived in front of my students and the adults around me what I believed and the direction I was heading.
I decided that since I believed God's word, God's leading, that I would have to move forward using the Scriptures as the basis for the where I was going, and the values that I firmly believed in. I'll admit it. I believe the Scriptures are the basis for doing what I do, where I go and if people don't want that kind of leadership then I don't fit. In the middle of that step on to the next step: Remember this; you are not a leader to be liked or loved. You are a leader to lead. You will have plenty of critics, people that are jealous of what you do, people that won't like what you do or say and the list goes on and on. Co-dependent leaders don't last long as leaders. Co-dependent leaders ultimately turn into followers. So do some self-introspection.
Step two: I talk with those ahead of me my mentor, my ministry friends that had been in the trenches and asked about possible "red flags" or issues I may be creating. In other words I prepared for the doubters, the naysayers, the back lash, the critics and those that just would not follow. I was prepared for worst and at the same time I will continue to push forward. Step three: I listen to only those that know me, love me, and have my best interest in mind. I wanted and want people that love me to let me know where I am blowing it, where I am excelling, where I can improve, but that is not for everyone. That will kill you.
To this day I don't really listen to the people that have no skin in the game. You know the students that only come when they feel you are doing things for them. You know the parents that stand on the sidelines and constantly complain. They complained before I came to the church, they complained to the last guy, the just complain. I will listen to those that have a track record with me with honesty, character, love and care for me. You can't listen to everyone-- choose wisely. Step four: If you believe in the direction you are to go. You have taken some steps, at some point you gotta put everything and go for it. Share the vision loudly, boldly, clearly, gather up students, leaders and parents that you see have skin in the game, want to go for it and go, go, go. Always encouraging others to join in, to pray with you, to live it with you.
Finally have the courage, the bravery, the trust in God, the trust in your leadership people you are specifically forming, trust in the fact that "hey you are the leader. You are there to lead. Now begin to go and lead. If you are already past this stuff and you are looking for some new ways to lead, by all means seek God on some new endeavors, some new vision, a renewed heart and believe you are there to lead, so lead on with new vision. Don't forget to bring people with you in the process. Bring them with you while you seek out God for some "newness". Ask God to show you some key students that are ready to go with you. Note: Be sure of this. All your weaknesses will come out over time. You can either try to spend a whole bunch of time trying to fix 'em, find gifted people to help out or pretend you don't have weaknesses.
I have chosen through the years to know my weaknesses, not spend the time hiding them or denying them or some I didn't even try to fix. I just found gifted people around me and asked them to help me. I know many "leaders" that for their own sake would help their cause if they would just embrace their weaknesses and stop spending the time denying or fixing and get on with leading.