Three to five years. That's the national average tenure for a youth ministry leader, according to prior research by National Network of Youth Ministries.
But somehow, by the grace of God, I've stayed rooted in one church for more than twice that: 11 years.
I'm celebrating that milestone with 11 lessons I've learned. Not from a textbook or a conference, and in no particular order, but from showing up week after week to love students, lean on Jesus, and learn the hard (and holy) way.
1. Intimacy with God > Everything
Nothing else in ministry matters more than your personal walk with Jesus. Let the work of the Lord never replace time with the Lord.
2. Guard Your Sabbath Like a Treasure
Whether it's one full day or sacred hours scattered throughout the week, don't just take a break, be with God. Make space to just be.
3. Cover It All in Prayer
Your church, your youth, your team, your leaders, your fellow staff, they all need to be lifted regularly. Prayer isn't the side hustle, it's the main job.
4. Pray Beyond Your Walls
Lift up your city, other churches, and the schools around you. If your heart breaks for them in prayer, your hands will follow in action.
5. Show Up On Campuses
Don't just invite students to come to you, go to them. Be present. Be known. Show students and faculty you care enough to show up.
6. Your Family Is More Important Than Your Ministry
Say yes to your spouse and kids. Say no to ministry more than you think you should. This is one of the biggest keys to longevity.
7. Stay in Community With Other Youth Leaders
You need people who get it. Find them. Laugh, cry, vent, pray. Repeat.
8. Be Graceful to Yourself
You won't always get it right. You'll drop balls, miss cues, or feel like quitting. Keep showing up. God's grace covers you too.
9. Don't Walk Into Conversations With Your Mind Made Up
Be curious. Be teachable. Listen to understand, not just to respond. The Holy Spirit speaks through others too.
10. Just Say "Yes, Sir" to the Holy Spirit
Obedience brings peace. Even when it's scary, inconvenient, or makes zero sense. If He's speaking, follow. You'll never regret it.
11. Go Where Students Already Are
The best ministry moments won't be inside your youth room. Grab a "mobile ministry bag" and go, to games, lunch tables, parking lots. Jesus didn't say, "Build a building and wait." He said, "Go."
Keep Showing Up
To every youth leader reading this: God called you. He sees you. He's with you.
Keep showing up. You're making more of a difference than you know.
Jeremy Cole has been in vocational ministry since August 2014, but had felt called by God long before. He has been blessed to serve his home church for over a decade. Along the way, he's grown every year and found joy in helping other youth workers grow through local collaboration.